Thursday, 31 October 2013

KIDERO storms out of RAILA ODINGA’s meeting claiming he is talking nonsense.. threatens to beat MUTHAMA and WETANGULA



2013-10-31: The political rivalry between Nairobi Governor, Dr Evans Kidero, and former Prime Minister Raila Odinga came out in public on Tuesday morning, after the besieged Nairobi Governor stormed out of a closed door meeting organized by CORD leader Raila Odinga.
According to our moles who attended the meeting, Kidero who had turned up for the meeting as early as 9 am disagreed with his party boss after reports emerged that his association with President Uhuru Kenyatta is one of the agendas to be discussed by ODM party members.
Kidero, who is known to have a heavily built body and a no nonsense man, was furious and even threatened to beat Machakos Senator, Johnstone Muthama and former Bungoma Senator, Moses Wetangula, who kept on insisting that his association with Uhuru must be one of the many agendas to be discussed by members during a CORD Parliamentary Group Meeting which is ongoing at Orange House.
It took the intervention of Raila's bouncers (hired private security) who stopped Kidero from raining blows on Muthama and Wetangula who were shouting at him.
Kidero later kept his cool and was seen leaving the Orange House even before the CORD meeting started. Kenya Daily Post

Three reasons why Arsenal CAN’T win the league


Arsenal might be bidding to win their first league title since 2004, but  GarriHirriyuki Tagawah points to three key reasons as to why Arsene Wenger’s men won’t be champions come May.

Squad depth
Arsenal stunned the football world (and most Gooners) by signing Mesut Ozil on transfer deadline day, but despite the German’s arrival, it was a pretty poor window all round.
The Gunners are well stocked with midfielders, but are short in a number of areas – especially up front, and will struggle to cope with the demands of a lengthy title challenge.
The season is just a few weeks old and Wenger is already roping in the kids to fill the bench, and while that’s an admirable policy, they are not ready to change games and make the difference.


No experience
Winning breeds winners, and although some of Arsenal’s squad have tasted glory elsewhere, none of them are proven Premier League champions.
Wenger’s men have come up short before with a lack of experience and true leaders, and when things start getting tight after Christmas, the lack of knowledge in winning league titles will come home to roost.

That defense (or lack of)
Arsenal are well known all over the world for their slick attacking football, but when they don’t have possession, it’s panic stations.
Per Mertesacker, Laurent Koscielny and Thomas Vermaelen are all proven campaigners, but the trio have all made plenty of mistakes with nobody taking control at the back.
Defensive problems have haunted Arsenal in the past, and unless things change dramatically, they will trouble the Gunners again.

Wednesday, 30 October 2013

Kikuyus and problems (joke)


Where Kikuyus are...... there must be a problem..... and a solution in the
making.......... ........... ..

Angel Gabriel came to the Lord and said 'I have to talk to you. We have some Kikuyus up here and are causing problems. They're swinging on the pearly gates, my horn is missing, they are wearing Savco jeans instead of their white robes, they're riding pick up trucks instead of the chariots, and they're selling their halos to people for discount prices. Furthermore, they refuse to keep the stairway to Heaven clear, since they keep crouching down midway hawking their wings! They have sub-let their mansions and are now living in the SQs. They are even attempting "atiriri" talk over here! I found some attempting to fit a carrier on the chariot for carrying "thaara wa n'gombe " (Napier grass) on their way from visits! they are even usingmpesa to send money to "andu aitu" in hell.

The Lord said, 'Kikuyus are Kikuyus. If you want to know about real problems, call the devil.'

The Devil answered the phone, 'Hello? Hold on a minute.' The Devil returned to the phone, 'OK I'm back. What can I do for you?'
Gabriel replied, 'I just wanted to know what kind of problems you're having down there.' The Devil said, 'Hold on again. I need to check on something..'
After about 5 minutes the Devil returned to the phone and said, 'I'm back... Now what was the question?' Gabriel said, 'What kind of problems are you having down there?' The Devil said, 'Man I don't believe
this.......Hold on.' in the background you can hear "ngai!!!"

This time the Devil was gone 15 minutes.. The Devil returned and said, 'I'm sorry Gabriel, I can't talk right now. Those Kikuyus have put out the fire and are selling me a match box if I want to light the fire again!

Kenyatta University 2013/2014 1st Semester Provisional Examination Timetable Details

  1.  Provisional Examination Timetable for Continueing group (Y2,3,4): Semester 1: Academic  Year 2013/2013 ( Main Campus).
  2. Provisional Examination Timetable for First Year group (Y1): Semester 1: Academic  Year 2013/2013 ( KU-Satellite Campuses).
  3. Privisional Examination Timetable for Engineering Programmes : Semester 1: Academic  Year 2013/2013 ( Main Campus & KU-Satellite Campuses).
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How To Tell When A Woman Just Had Séx

Did you know that just by walking down the street, or across the office, people may be able to figure out that you've gotten láid?

Because having a váginal orgásm does more than just put a little pep in your step. It actually causes you to walk differently, with a longer stride and a greater pélvic rotation.

In a European study, trained séxologists (nice job title) were able to pick out, with an 81 percent accuracy, which women had an orgásm just by watching them walk.

But that's not the only way someone can tell if a woman has had séx. Here are a few others:

The Glow: There's a scientific reason for us getting the flushéd in the cheeks look after séx -- more blood flow -- but what about that aura of calm that seems to float around us after the fact? It happens. Recently, my husband and I went on a post-coital grocery store trip and ran in to some friends. The wife remarked to me, "You're glowing," with a little wink and a nod.

The Cat Who Ate The Canary Grin: This is also known as the Smirking Smile and if you see a woman looking sideways with this look on her face, you'll know, yep, she just got láid. She has a secret that's making her go through her day with a sense of fulfillment. Because, seriously, nobody is that happy unless they just had séx with a happy ending.

The Wét Spot: I know this is gross but getting séminal moisturé leaking through to your pants can be an unfortunate byproduct of having séx, at least if you don't use a condóm or your partner doesn't pull out. And it's not one of the good ways you would want someone to be able to tell that you recently had séx. Wéaring a pad post-intercourse can help prévent this -- just sayin'.

The Unfláppably Buoyánt Mood: A post-intercoursé risé in é dorphins can give you a fresh pérspective on the annoyances of every day life: Go ahead, honk at me because I'm going too slow. Cut in front of me in the check-out line at the store. And let my kids scream at each other while they argue over who gets to sit in the front seat on the way to school. I. Don't. Care. Thanks to a little early morning sunrise surprise, nothing is going to put me in a bad mood. - See more at:

'Jesus and Mary' Spotted on Google Earth

Jesus and Mary have been spotted on Google Earth.

The extraordinary image, which can be seen on the satellite imaging site, appears to show a shrouded Messiah accompanied by Mother Mary.

The dark image of the son of God can be seen on the left, while his mother's outline, coloured white and pink, is on the right.

Mary even appears to be cloaked in a flowing gown, head bowed and hands held in prayer.
The image was snapped by Google as its imaging vehicle drove along the A5 highway near Walensee, in Switzerland.

- Mirror.co.uk

Jesus and Mary have been spotted on Google Earth.

The extraordinary image, which can be seen on the satellite imaging site, appears to show a shrouded Messiah accompanied by Mother Mary.

The dark image of the son of God can be seen on the left, while his mother's outline, coloured white and pink, is on the right.

Mary even appears to be cloaked in a flowing gown, head bowed and hands held in prayer.
The image was snapped by Google as its imaging vehicle drove along the A5 highway near Walensee, in Switzerland.

- Mirror.co.uk 
- See more at: http://www.africanewspost.com/2013/10/jesus-and-mary-spotted-on-google-earth.html#sthash.cy6ujl5Y.dpuf

Friday, 25 October 2013

International Criminal Court rules Ruto to attend all trial

Deputy President William Ruto has suffered a major setback at the International Criminal Court after the Appeals Chamber reversed a decision excusing him from continuous attendance at trial.
The Chamber headed by ICC President Judge Sang-Hyun Song unanimously reversed the Trial Chambers V (a) decision which granted Ruto conditional excusal from physical presence so that he can attend to his constitutional duties as deputy head of state.
The Chamber concluded that the Trial Chamber had interpreted the scope of its discretion to broadly.
“The Appeals Chamber held that before granting an accused excusal from physical presence at trial, the possibility of alternative measures must be considered, including but not limited to changes to the trial schedule or temporary adjournment,” the Judges said.

Furthermore, any absence should be considered on a case-by-case basis and limited to that which strictly necessarysaid judge Song as he rendered the ruling on Friday.In June, the three-judge panel ruled by a majority of two to one that the deputy president should be allowed to miss routine hearings in order to conduct state affairs.
The two – Judge Chile Eboe-Osuji and Judge Robert Fremr – emphasised the presumption of innocence and ruled that rather than enforce the provision, it was more important to do what is “fair, reasonable and just” under the court’s procedures.
The third judge, Olga Herrera Carbuccia from the Dominican Republic, disagreed with her colleagues and said the Rome State provision could not be ignored.
"Mr Ruto should not be given a different legal status on the basis of his personal position as deputy president of the Republic of Kenya," she wrote in her dissenting opinion.
Basing her argument on the dissenting opinion of judge Olga Herrera Carbuccia, Ms Bensouda appealed the decision.
Bensouda warned that the absence of the Mr Ruto from the trials could be used as the reason for the Appeals Chamber to cancel the outcome of the hearings.
She submitted that the judges acted beyond the discretion provide for them in the Rome Statute and argued that by excusing Mr Ruto, and not his fellow co-accused Joshua arap Sang from the evidential phase of the proceedings, the judges had tossed the doctrine of fair conduct of hearings.
On September 23, Kenyatta’s lawyer also asked judges to allow the president to be excused from attending proceedings so as to allow him to attend to his duties as president.

Even death is taxable in KIAMBU county’s bizarre Bill

Dying is going to become an extremely costly affair in Kiambu if the county forges ahead with plans in its Finance Bill, 2013.
In a move that the county government says is meant to raise revenue to fund its Sh12.6 billion budget, the region is also proposing to tax farmers before the carcasses of their livestock and pets can be collected for disposal.
To conduct burial on one’s soil, the bereaved will have to fork out Sh4,500 if the dead is an adult, Sh3,000 for a child and Sh2,500 for an infant.
Families whose relatives die and are buried in cemeteries within the county will pay Sh8,000 for a permanent grave while those whose loved ones die in other counties but are to be buried in Kiambu will pay Sh10,000. Non-residents of Kiambu will be charged Sh25,000.
Besides these charges, the families will be required to pay Sh30,000 every time maintenance work is undertaken on the graves in cemeteries.
Should a grave be reopened, say, in the event of a court order, families will pay Sh15,000 if the dead was an adult, Sh10,000 for a child and Sh5,000 for an infant.
Speaking in Githunguri earlier in the week, Kiambu Governor William Kabogo said the Bill would not be amended, but would be implemented as the executive had proposed.
Sigona ward representative Mutonya Njenga said it was inhumane to charge mourning families before allowing them to bury their loved ones.
Proposed burial fees
“I believe Kabogo is playing politics with the Bill because it is just a draft, which must go through amendments at the assembly whose mandate is legislation,” he said and proposed a zero charge for burials at home and Sh1,000 for burials at public cemeteries.
Mr Njenga said he had received numerous complaints from the residents about the Bill and especially the proposed burial fees.
The 70-page Bill was tabled before the County Assembly by the acting chairman of the Finance committee, Mr Lawrence Mwaura.
The revenue raised is expected to finance Kiambu’s Sh12.6 billion budget, which includes Sh100 million for the governor’s office, Sh155 million for the county assembly and Sh515 million for education and social services.
Some County Assembly representatives have already protested against some of the proposals in the Bill as have residents who have described the plans as draconian and insensitive.
Mr Lawrence Mwaura, who is the vice-chairman of the Kiambu County Assembly’s Finance Committee and the representative for Ting’ang’a yesterday said: “The Bill is just a wish list that is being subjected to different sectoral committees where changes are being made to create a win-win situation for the residents and the county leaders.”
Mr Mwaura urged other ward representatives to inform the public that the Bill was just a draft, and they have 19 calendar days to work on it and come up with a final copy that would be presented to the assembly.
Farmers have not been spared either as they will be charged Sh4,000 for every cow, pig, donkey or horse that dies on their land before the county government can collect the carcasses for disposal.
“I would rather dump my dead cow or donkey on the roadside in the night instead of parting with Sh4,000 per animal as collection fee,” Mr Benson Maina, a resident of Limuru sub-county in Kiambu, said.
Disposing the carcasses of chickens and cats will cost their owners Sh400 a-piece.
In an even more bizarre proposal, county government officials — to be known as ward administrators — will charge every household a fee for slaughtering livestock with chicken attracting the lowest levy (Sh20), a goat Sh150 and a cow Sh400.
This is the first time such a measure is being introduced. The county intends to hire 60 administrators to work in all the eight constituencies in the county.
Entertainment spots have not been left out either. Night clubs with the capacity to host more than 50 patrons will pay Sh50,000 for annual licenses while each butchery that also offers roast meat will be charged Sh7,000.
Pubs with traditional liquor and has seats that can host 16 to 50 patrons will pay Sh10,000 while video and cinema halls will be charged Sh25,000.
Business premises that put up Christmas decorations will pay an additional Sh2,000 to cover the duration of the festivities.
A business or any other organisation with a signboard showing directions to their premises will also be required to pay Sh5,000 for each sign per year.

US defends Kenyan journalists over Westgate coverage


The United States urged the Kenyan government on Thursday to protect "rights to freedom of the Press."
State Department spokeswoman Marie Harf made the comment in response to a reporter's question about the US view of Kenyan authorities' threats to prosecute journalists for their coverage of officials' handling of the Westgate attack.
"We believe in Kenya, as we do everywhere, that a free and independent media is a critical element of a vibrant democracy," Ms Harf said.
She was also asked whether the Kenyan government's threats to prosecute journalists would influence the US response to the effort at the UN to defer the Hague cases against Kenya's leaders.
"Not to my knowledge," Ms Harf replied. "I’ll check in with our folks who are actually reviewing their proposal right now."
'FORCED PATRIOTISM'
Also on Thursday, the New York-based Committee to Protect Journalists called the Kenyan authorities' crackdown on the media an attempt at "forced patriotism" that potentially signified "a downward spiral of Press freedom" in Kenya.
A Nairobi-based consultant for the advocacy group compared the Kenyan government's intimidation to the "self-censorship (that) took hold of the American press in the wake of the 9/11 terrorist attack."
The result, consultant Tom Rhodes added, was that "few questioned the lack of evidence to justify invading Iraq."
"It would appear authorities in Kenya expect similar broad, unquestioning media support for their handling of terrorist attacks here," Mr Rhodes observed.

Westgate: Kimaiyo now threatens journalists

Police boss David Kimaiyo on Wednesday announced that journalists will be arrested and prosecuted


Mungiki insider and gender expert set to testify in Uhuru case


ICC judges on Wednesday allowed the prosecutor to add two more witnesses in the case against President Kenyatta with one of the new entrants being a Mungiki insider and the other a gender violence expert.
The Trial Chamber judges also rejected Mr Kenyatta’s legal team’s request to postpone the trial by four months in the event that the two additional prosecution witness are brought on board.
The judges had argued that Prosecutor Fatou Bensouda had promised to use the two witnesses after January 2014.
Judges Kuniko Ozaki, Robert Fremr and Chile Eboe-Osuji ruled that the Mungiki insider who is Witness P-548 and a sexual and gender-based violence expert, P-66, will bring new dimensions to the case facing Mr Kenyatta, whose trial is scheduled for November 12.
QUESTIONS AT ISSUE
“The Chamber is persuaded from P-548’s witness statements and the prosecution’s submissions that much of the proposed evidence of P-548... brings to light previously unknown facts, which have a significant bearing on the case and would be of relevance in determining the questions at issue in this case,” they ruled on the Mungiki insider.
On the sexual violence expert, the judges agreed with the prosecution that it was a replacement of another witness, P-426, who withdrew from the case under unexplained circumstances.
“The Chamber is satisfied that Witness 426’s withdrawal means that P-66’s proposed evidence brings to light otherwise unknown facts, which have a significant bearing upon the case. Further, given the overlap P-66’s proposed evidence has with that of former Witness 426, the Chamber considers that the Defence has previously had an opportunity to prepare for similar evidence in this case,” they ruled.
However, the judges instructed Ms Bensouda to disclose the identity of the two witnesses to Mr Kenyatta’s lawyers and directed that they be among the last to be called to the witness box to testify in the case arising from the 2007/8 post election violence.
“The Chamber orders the prosecution to disclose the identities of Witnesses 548 and 66 and all disclosable information relating to them forthwith and directs the prosecution to call Witnesses 548 and 66 among the last witnesses of the prosecution case,” they ruled.
The judges were alive to the potential linkage of the evidence from Witness 548 to the statements of other Mungiki witnesses and gave in to the request by the defence team made of Steven Kay and Gillian Higgins to push forward their testimonies.
They said: “The prosecution is also directed not to call any of its Mungiki witnesses until at least the end of January 2014. If the prosecution considers that the security situation for any of its Mungiki witnesses requires a variation of this direction, it is directed to seize the Chamber with an application to this effect.”
Wednesday’s ruling comes at a time when a cloud of uncertainty surrounds Mr Kenyatta’s attendance of his trial at The Hague.
Two weeks ago, the African Union asked him to skip the trial as they engage the UN Security Council to defer the cases the President and his deputy, Mr William Ruto, are facing at The Hague.
A team of five ministers has been nominated by the African Union to push for the deferral at the Security Council. AU commission chairperson Nkosazana Dlamini-Zuma and Ethiopia’s Foreign minister Tedros Adhanom who chairs the AU Executive Council will lead the team.
MASSIVE INTERFERENCE
The Trial Chamber has already allowed Mr Kenyatta to skip most of the proceedings except the opening and closing statements of all parties, judgement and sentencing, if it will apply.
Two weeks ago, Mr Kenyatta’s defence team wrote to the Trial Chamber seeking to stop his case on grounds that the prosecution had abused the court process, making it difficult for Mr Kenyatta to get justice.
They claimed to have evidence of massive interference in the court process by the prosecution intermediaries and its witnesses citing prosecution witnesses OTP-118, OTP-11 and OTP-12.
“The Defence is in possession of substantial evidence of a serious, sustained and wide-ranging abuse on the process of the Court carried out by Prosecution witness OTP-118 and prosecution intermediary, and Prosecution   witnesses OTP-11 and OTP-12,” said the defence team.
Should the Trial Chamber turn down their request, Mr Kenyatta’s lawyer registered another prayer of the judges ordering evidential hearing before the start of the trial to determine the issue of abuse of process.

Wednesday, 23 October 2013

SHOCKING: WETANGULA's ‘hidden’ son languishes in poverty and operates boda boda despite his father’s wealth






FORMER Bungoma Senator, Moses Wetangula, is a man under siege - from one scandal to another.

Barely three months after a woman sued Wetangula for child maintenance after the embattled Senator abandoned his child and the woman, who she married under customary law, it has emerged that Wetangula has forgotten yet another child, a grown up man, who he got out of wedlock, and is now languishing in abject poverty in Bunyore, Vihiga County.

The man, who now fends for his family by operating bodaboda in some remote village in Bunyore, said he had very dark secrets about his father after he abandoned him and his mother in abject poverty despite all his wealth, and that he had very embarrassing information to divulge to the public about his life with the absent honourable father.

The man said his father is very rich, in fact at one point he boasted of being one of the richest guys in Bungoma and to a larger extent the entire Luhya nation, but all that has not helped the family as someone like him should be somewhere doing business or having a good job and not operating Bodaboda as if his father was a pauper.

He further said even though he is not happy about his life, he can’t complain so much because his boda boda business gives him enough to take care of the family and that he is safe with Wetangula out of his life.



  
  

Tuesday, 22 October 2013

KCSE 2013 LEAKAGE




English: "Aiyahyahyah! Kidero You've Slapped me" add a Question Tag.

Kiswahili: "Aiyahyahyah! Kidero You've Slapped me" weka maneno haya katika muktadha ufaao.

Biology: name the body hormone that causes reflex action like Slappin a yappin woman then causes temporary loss of memory.

Physics: Sentences are flying out of Shebesh's mouth at 14 words per second, Kidero's hand is movin towards her cheek at 2 m/s, calculate the heat and sound energy produced when he hits the target.

CRE: You are the governor, You slap the Women Rep. A Reporter asks you about the incident, as a good christian,what should you say?

Business: Write an advertisement for a New Medicine, Slapanol, which treats A disease called Pang'ang'a, (remember 2 include the 2 people who helped demonstrate how it works)

Agriculture: "I dont remember slapping anyone" name the grade of bhang that the governor might have consumed to forget slapping the Women Rep.

KCSE LEAKAGE!

Section D
1. If 15 terrorist were at westgate, 5 were gunned down in 4 days by 1000 military men, 100 recce, 200 gsu, 200 police, 300 APs and 3 choppers covering airspace without
forgetting Abdul Haji and company security agency, calculate the time that will take all terrorist to be killed and displayed having in mind the 5 killed are yet to be
displayed, use the formula 15-5=0. (without using forensic results) (10marks)

2. a) What was the burning intensity of the mattresses that caused the three storey building to collapse (5marks)
b) How do we call the sound produced by the burning mattresses? (2marks)
c) Give three reasons why you're still using mattress at home yet you know its effects (refer to westgate fire) (3marks)

3. a) Shebesh took 5months to get gubernatorial slap and just 3 weeks to get senator's
slap, going by the trend, calculate the time she'll get Mps slap? (5marks)
b) If she gets MPs slap, will she survive? (1Mark)
c)What do you think is the cause of all this slapping? (1Mark)
d) people learn from their mistakes, do you think shebesh is learning from her mistakes?(1Mark).

Wednesday, 16 October 2013

DJ MO should see this….Here is a list of MEN who have SÉXED SIZE 8…a form four student in the list.


Recently, gospel Dj Mo got married to Size 8 in a private wedding held at Attorney General’s office. But perhaps, Dj Mo might have been coinfused by Size 8′s bóoty shaking without considering the men who have séxed her before.
According to sources, the “Mateke” hit maker is referred to as “the hórny one” in the secular industry.
And now, here is a list of all men who have banged size 8.
Willy M Tuva
Jaguar
Kenzo
Dk Kwenye beat( Dj Mo’s friend….Karma is a bítch
Jua Cali
Clemmo
Kenti of MOG
Bobby Mapesa
Eric Omondi
Ala C
Salim Juma- A form four student at Jamhuri high school…he said to have banged Size 8 during one of the Insyder funkies

Courtesy of uhondo254

Tuesday, 15 October 2013

STORY OF MY LIFE- LONE FELIX ,MUST READ!

Q. You are always in hurry, why do you walk so fast?
LONE FELIX ILLUSTRATES A POINT DURING THE INTERVIEW
LONE FELIX ILLUSTRATES A POINT DURING THE INTERVIEW
(Laughing) I never quite realize that. But when I was nine, I developed severe rheumatoid arthritis and was unable to walk for almost three months. When I got better, I had understood why being able to be on your feet is very important. Ever since then, I started walking quite fast and it became a habit.
Q. That would mean that your love for suits also has a story?
Not really. I think being in a good suit projects a good image and gives one confidence. Pretty much that is why I do them. Over time, it’s become what I am associated with.
Q. Tell us about your growing up
I grew up in rural Western Kenya; brought up by a single mother. Life was challenging, walking five kilometers barefoot to school; countless nights of going without food. I however don’t think that I was so disadvantaged; thousands of Kenyan children pass through the same problems. And in addition, I had a mother who loved me unconditionally.
I would sit and watch her cut trees, or uproot tree stumps to burn charcoal. Yet she always managed to afford a smile. As a kid, such deep love makes you forget hunger and lack.
Q. That’s was a tough life by all measures
Not really, I have met stories in my life that make me thank God for the experiences I had a child. And in a way, these struggles form the core of my values; they have given me a deep sense of empathy and value for others.
Q. If you had a chance to recreate your life, how different would you like your childhood to be?
(Early July)Lone Felix Makes a call at JKIA before when about to depart for a global leadership Forum in South Africa
(Early July)Lone Felix Makes a call at JKIA before when about to depart for a global leadership Forum in South Africa
I am unable to answer that question. Sometimes I wish I had a father by my side, but I actually think his not being there made me stronger. It taught me to fight my own battles, to write my own story, to make my own mistakes and correct them. I do not therefore know what I would want different, but I know I would not want to miss in that life the lessons my mother’s struggles gave me.
Q. That’s the fourth time you are saying mother, would you say you are a mama’s boy?
If being a mama’s boy means loving your mom immeasurably, then probably I am. But when bringing us up, she was keen to ensure that we knew our roles as men. We were to make our own decisions and be responsible. I do not live in her shadow, but her influence in my life is something that will last a lifetime.
Q. Tell us about your early schooling?
I joined Nursery school in 1994. I remember there was a huge fight before I agreed to go to school. I had my first fight on my second day in nursery, and the madam, her name was Justine, really caned me.
I was very tiny then, so I was not allowed to go to class one. The qualification for proceeding was much about being able to pass your left hand to touch your right ear (laughs). So I spend two years in Nursery school, then at age six I joined standard one.
In 1999 when I contracted arthritis, so I was out of school for six months and had to retake standard four in 2000. It’s also the same year when my dad died.
I developed excessive bitterness around that time, in part it’s because; I had just seen my father three times, and the last time he told me, he would change my school. When he died, the dreams of ever having a father crushed and with it deep hate.
With Sauti Sol on the Side Lines of the Annual Leadership & Education Congress
With Sauti Sol on the Side Lines of the Annual Leadership & Education Congress
Walking home from his school to see his grave each day added to my desperation. Mom’s struggles at that point intensified, family feuds over property, it was too much to bear. So I moved from Rural Busia to my maternal uncle in Rural Bungoma, a place called Namanze. Q. My cousin worked in a mission hospital at a place called Khasoko; it should be close to that place
They are very close. It’s at Namanze where I sat my KCPE IN 2004.
Q. High school?
I was offered admission to Friends school Kamusinga. I had struggled and attained 432 marks out of 500. But you see, we could not raise school fees or money for shopping. So I picked the box that my sister had used for her high school and bits of shopping mom had realized then went to school. A donor had pledged to pay my school fees but the cheque would be a day late. So I was turned away. I got the cheque next day, but when I went back to school, I was told when you miss to report the first day, you forfeit your chance.
Q. What did that mean to you?
It was crushing. At the time it seemed like everything was unfair and it was very hard for me to make sense out of it.
Q. So what did you do?
Doris Mwendwa (William College USA), Lone Felix and Popular Comedian Churchill Leave after the closure of the Annual Leadership & Education Congress
Doris Mwendwa (William College USA), Lone Felix and Popular Comedian Churchill Leave after the closure of the Annual Leadership & Education Congress
I sought help from the District Education Office but hit a dead end. I was taken in at Khasoko Secondary School in rural Bungoma. Then in my second form I joined Goseta mixed secondary school then, in Trans-Nzoia.
The school accepted me to stay; I was never asked school fees. I think God has a way of helping out. My family could not even raise Ksh. 3600 for KCSE registration; it was the school that paid it for me. The cumulative debt was written off when I registered the first (A) plain for the school.
Q. What is the most vivid memory you have of your childhood?
On this Wednesday, it was 1997 at the height of a hunger. I got home from school and there was no food. It was perfectly normal. So I changed and went to get some sugar canes. In the evening, when mom came home, she was singing. Whenever mom sang, I would know she was sad. She always hid her misery in songs.
She told us there was no food, but she had a bit of flour and would make porridge. So I sat on the side extracting juice from sugarcane, we used the juice as sugar. Suddenly she stopped and scoped something from the boiling porridge.
I then saw tears in her eyes. She said it was a caterpillar. She had stirred it and basically we could not take the porridge. I followed her crying, and as she poured the porridge to the ground, I held her hand and told her: mom I am hungry, let me just take it.
She said, no son, you can’t do that; life is much more than a day’s meal. That line has never left my ear.
Q. What was the lowest moment of your childhood?
When growing up we faced a lot of challenges. Mom was very determined to see us grow and she did everything. Now when there was totally no food, mom used to go to posho-mills and she would take the flour that had been swept from the floor.
And that is what we would eat, now that flour had the smell of oil and had been obviously stepped on by people. Such moments are not as pleasing to any child.
Q. It is very hard for anyone to reconcile that childhood, with the person you are now?
And I fully understand that. It has been a fight that still continues. My family still struggles; but definitely, today I am able to help though to a limited level.
It’s not just about my struggles or the prayers and love of my family. It has been about very many people who have believed in me; people who have invested their love, money and given me acceptance.
My second mom, Kyambi Kavali who paid my form one school fees, my high school Principal Mr. Wasike, My Business Education teacher Ms. Caroline, My friends who took me in their cribs when I had nowhere to go to or guys who pick me when I am to be rushed to hospital or the guy that drops me a facebook inbox saying I love your work.
Q. How were you as a teenager?
(Laughing), just like any other teenager, rebellious a times, obnoxious sometimes. I struggled with all challenges that face any teenager. I was never a perfect kid.
Q. Or should I ask, would you like your son to be like you?
I would like my son to be himself. If I said yes, I would be imagining that I am anything close to being perfect, if I said no, I would saying I am too ill to wish my son to be like me. I hope they can be themselves.
Q. People think you are very stern and rigid?
That is before perhaps you know me better. I think I am an easy person. In fact, some of my friends cannot understand how people take me seriously. You remember Rose telling you, she knows more of the comedian in me than the serious person?
I think I balance out, my public moments come with the restraint required, and my private moments are also relaxed.
Q. What is it about you that people do not know?
Quite much, I never take a cold shower for example. I have an allergy whenever I take a cold shower (laughs out loud.) And the other thing is that I am very particular about my food.
(On that food note, let’s close this chapter. One of his closest Friends, Emmanuel vows one thing, he cannot cook anything except coffee for Lone Felix. The boy is actually a good cook.)

Monday, 14 October 2013

Uhuru CORNERED: The Constitution is CLEAR, Uhuru MUST attend ICC Trials, Otherwise Referundum Or Amend The Constitution



Perhaps it is for lack of foresight or just another warm up for total disregard of the constitutional provisions, it turns out the country will have to go for an  urgent referendum or Parliament to urgently repeal certain sections of The Kenya Constitution or make amendments that will softly cover The Head of State should he opt to defy ICC trials.
The Constitution of Kenya 2010,shoots tough, candid, straight and clear:
Art. 1(1) – “ALL sovereign power BELONGS to the PEOPLE of Kenya and shall be exercised only in accordance with this Constitution”.
Art. 2(1) – ” The Constitution is the supreme law of the Republic and binds ALL persons and ALL State organs at both levels of government”.
Art. 2(5) – “The general rules of international law shall form part of the law of Kenya
Key Questions
  • Does Uhuru’s Jubilee got numbers to pass a constitutional amendment?
  • Can Uhuru rally Kenyans behind an anti- ICC referendum?
  • Will Ruto play ball now that it is clear that he was set up to test waters?
  • What is the timeline?
Very interesting times to be a Kenyan, with stagflation hitting hard, Uhuru popularity ratings will be plummeting like an over-ripen avocado, prompting people even those from his stronghold to find it hard to rally behind him.
TIME WILL TELL, we should wish our president well, it is no longer a little personal matter, perhaps he should JUST ACCEPT AND MOVE ON, Kenya is bigger than an individual ama?



Shock As Africa Dictators Cheer And Abandon Uhuru Just Like They Did To Muamar Gadhafi, No Mass Pullout From ICC!


FROM threat of withdrawal to a kick of a dying horse called ultimatum


Did we not say that the threat of withdrawal from ICC was a mere grandstanding and useless intimidation to ICC by frogs and lame donkeys who are known as butchers and murderers of their own citizens for political power.
The African dictators led by Kaguta Museveni of Uganda and Robert Mugabe of Zimbabwe met on Saturday, October 12, 2013 at the African Union (AU) headquarters in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia and instead of withdrawing en-mass as they had threatened before the meeting, the cowards backed-off abandoning and throwing Uhuru Kenyatta under the bus like they did before to the late Muamar Gadhafi of Libya.
After cheating and beating the drums of war to Uhuru Kenyatta that he should defy the ICC, the dictators have now abandoned Uhuru at the last minute by asking him to carry his own cross. Uhuru was asked to write a letter to the UN Security Council seeking deferral as provided for in Article 15 of the Rome Statute.
Sources inside the closed-door deliberations of the Council of Ministers disclosed that Kenya had placed two requests for consideration – that the ICC cases be deferred and that the ICC be substantially reformed. Members agreed on the first request but were apprehensive on the latter noting that ICC was an independent institution and besides Africa lacked the necessary numbers to push for such changes.
It was resolved, among other agreements, that a five-member committee of the executive council, including one Kenyan, be formed to deliver the AU resolution and ultimatum to the UN next month. And to ensure this, the AU has given the United Nations Security Council an ultimatum of up to November 12 – the same day Uhuru trial is scheduled to begin – to defer the Kenyatta case.
If by November 30 the African leaders would not have received any communication from the UN, the AU will reconvene yet again to deliberate on the way forward. It is presumed that the plan of action may involve mass withdrawal by African nations from the Rome Statute.
The decision, arrived at by the African Heads of State during a special session in the Ethiopian capital Addis Ababa, is also meant to benefit Sudan President Omar Al-Bashir who is an earlier ICC indictee. And as if to make sure other similar Kenyatta and Al-Bashir cases do not come up, it was also resolved that any African country wishing to refer any cases to ICC must first refer to the AU for guidance and possible approval.
While to those with heads in the sand who think that Uhuru secured a breather, the fate of his Deputy William Ruto was swept under the carpet, as AU’s proposed privileges are did not cover deputy or vice presidents. Once again, the African dictators pledged to embark on their own mechanism of trying their own cases of crimes against humanity, mass murder and rape by strengthen the African Court of Justice and Human Rights as the first step.

S*x Secrets: The Number One Thing Women Want In Bed


Agreed, we all want different things in our s*xual lives, but research has revealed one common thing women truly want.And that is Emotional Intimacy.

During a survey of over 1,000 women, each woman was asked about their best s*x. 96 percent of the women revealed that the best s*x they have ever had was with someone with whom they are emotionally connected.

Other reasons women (and even sometimes men) gave for enjoying s*x include “being with someone I love,” followed by “feeling good about my s*xual abilities” and “when my partner compliments me.”

So what are the top three things women crave? The survey reveals that the top three requirements for great s*x are physical attraction, emotional intimacy and feeling secure and loved.

This also laid credence to the survey conducted by Durex which revealed that 87 percent of women said the hottest s*x they’d ever had was with someone they knew and trusted, and 95 percent of men said s*x is more fulfilling with an emotional connection.

So it seems the best way to get into a woman’s panties is through her heart.



Source: Huffington Post

Thursday, 10 October 2013

 LET'S RE-OWN OUR KUSA!
VOTE
 Lone Felix for president
 Dj Nesto aka Ernest Buyayi for organizing secretary
Jaffe Fesa for Academic secretary
OJUKA Albert for congress man school of SPAS
KAMA SI SASA,NI SASA HIVI!
#BADILISHA!
Don't vote Mugenda's puppets like Ole Matura a.k.a Ole Lenku wa K.U, vote revolutionary leaders,who will noat seat back and watch students being suppressed!! Someone who will not seat back and watch students being subjected to VAT on their school fees and nonsense issues like NHIF  like what the previous office did. Don't vote someone who will seat back and watch the administration counselling the institution's most important parties like FRESHAS' NIGHT due to petty STUPID SELFISH reasons! Let's vote a Sossion like type of leader who will advocate for our rights!!

UHURU IS DEAD!

Uhuru is dead politically due to his political opponents! No one cares about the jubilee government after sidelining its supporters! Uhuru has just proved that he is the most tribalistic leader Kenya has ever had from his appointments!!! Long live tribalism!! Long live the crying Ruto!!

WHY YOU SHOULD NOT VOTE MUGENGA'S PUPPETS FOR KUSA POSTS!



VOTE
 Dj Nesto aka Ernest Buyayi for organizing secretary
Lone Felix for president
Jaffe Fesa for Academic secretary
OJUKA Albert for congress man school of SPAS
Ochwangi for congres Man Nyayo 4!!
KAMA SI SASA,NI SASA HIVI!
#BADILISHA!
Don't vote Mugenda's puppets like Ole Matura a.k.a Ole Lenku wa K.U, vote revolutionary leaders,who will noat seat back and watch students being suppressed!! Someone who will not seat back and watch students being subjected to VAT on their school fees and nonsense issues like NHIF  like what the previous office did. Don't vote someone who will seat back and watch the administration counselling the institution's most important parties like FRESHAS' NIGHT due to petty STUPID SELFISH reasons! Let's vote a Sossion like type of leader who will advocate for our rights!!

Monday, 7 October 2013

MULEMBE/luhya NIGHT IS HERE AGAIN!!AT LOCUST GRILL-opposite Kahawa Barracks

MULEMBE NIGHT is here again!
The famous luhya night is here again!According to our sources, we are informed that the organisers this time have thrown in all their efforts and this cultural night will be none like any other before!we are informed that the famous brew BUSAA, wil be overflowing, not forgeting ingokho,mukombera,murere,ugali,chiswa chimyumu(kumbekumbe), and soo much more!
Performances from webuye Jua Kali, Mandari,Isukuti band,Wanyonyi Khatondi and famous dances will also light up the event! Not forgetting the one and only Luhya Dj,Dj Tagawah who will be giving you best of the best music from luhya land and all over Kenya and diaspora!!
Several Luhya political leaders will also be in the house!
Date; 11/10/2013
Venue; LOCUST GRILL,Kahawa Sukari next to Sanaa City opposite Kahawa Barracks.

 Damages,
Advance=100/=
VIP=250/
VVIP=500/=
Call/text 0707601297 for FREE ticket delivery.


DON'T MISS OUT THIS MEMORABLE EVENT!GET YOUR TICKET NOW!!

IEBC should bar MOSES WETANGULA from contesting Bungoma seat- He is an ELECTION THIEF!


Monday October 7,2013 - Meru County Women’s Representative, Florence Kajuju, has asked the Independent Electoral and Boundaries Commission (IEBC), not to clear former Bungoma Senator Moses Wetangula, for his engagement in electoral malpractices on March 4th election.

Speaking during the Launch of Miss Tourism Meru County at Slopes Hotel in Meru on Sunday, Kajuju said the High Court Judge who nullified Wetangula’s election last week ought to have convicted him for alleged malpractices.

“To be on the right and uphold the law, the IEBC should not clear him to contest,” Kajuju said.

The High Court last week nullified Wetangula’s election as a Senator citing a bag of electoral malpractices.

Wetangula, who is also one of the CORD luminaries, has maintained that he is free to vie for the Bungoma Senate seat since he was not convicted of any electoral malpractices when Bungoma High Court Judge Francis Gikonyo made a ruling last week.

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KENYATTA UNIVERSITY students CAUGHT on camera INSERTING BEER Bottles Into Their Genitals[Viewer Discretion Is Advised]



CLIC HERE FOR VIDEO>>>  

Two Maseno University students CAUGHT having S*X in the bush…… can’t afford lodging in Kisumu



  


Wednesday 2nd October 2013 - Two love birds from a University in Kisumu County yesterday caused drama in Lela after they were caught making love in a bush.

The two from Maseno University decided to have the forest adventure thinking that no one would find them.

They left the college at around 5 pm since Lela centre is a few minutes away. They boarded a matatu and alighted at their destination before proceeding to a bush to romp. The two held hands and were seen laughing as they walked into the forest to do their thing.

According to a resident, college students were used to visiting the place since it has rocks and other natural scenes. He said that it was a common sight to see ‘couples’ going there to hike and enjoy the scenery.

However, the two had a hidden agenda. Locals said that they were alerted by school going children who told them that the two were having s*x in the bush somewhere behind the rocks.

At first the locals thought it was a joke. Idlers rushed to the area and indeed caught the two making passionate love with their clothes spread down for comfort. They threatened to beat them up and confisticated their clothes.

The two lovers claimed that they were broke and couldn’t afford to book a room. The locals refused to buy their reason arguing that students are usually the richest in the area.

At the end, the two had to part with 500 bob for their freedom and clothes.




  

  

REVEALED: RAILA ODINGA has no University Engineering Degree – Only a Metal Work Certificate – Kenya Online Newspaper 2013

We  can now authoritatively report that former Prime Minister Raila Odinga has no recognised University degree, and he has been lying to the public for over 4 decades.
According to Otto Von Guericke Universitat Magdeburg website, the technical college, where Raila purports to have attained his degree became a University in 1987.
Raila Odinga finished his studies in 1970’s when the college was offering craftsmanship certificates for West German  students who specialized in Wood Work and Metal Work courses.
According to some insiders from the University who mailed us the information, Raila was awarded a certificate in metal work with many African students attending the college specialising in carpentry and joinery.
If you doubt the shocking revelations you can check on Wikipedia and see that Otto Von Guericke Universitat Magdeburg became a University in 1987!
So Raila Odinga who brags to be an Engineer by profession has no degree and he only has a Metal Work Certificate from Otto Von Guericke Technical College.